Wednesday, 4 April 2018

Boys Boys Boys

Being in a house full of boys is just as farty as you would imagine, but I love it. Before we discovered we were having a boy, I found it really hard to imagine an actual baby was inside me, let alone imagining it’s gender. I flitted between being convinced it was a girl and then being adamant it was a boy. Everyone tells you the standard bullshit myths to predict the gender. But really, people are ultimately just commenting on the way you’ve got fat, “oh you’re carrying on your hips. Must be a girl!” ... URM, NO CAROL. The crisp sandwiches have gone to my hips. Now move aside you liar, I need another snack.
I genuinely had no preference. My only request was a healthy baby with a dark sense of humour and a love for pasties. But when they told us it was a boy, I cried with happiness seeing his little willy on the scan. Jason was so keen for a boy. Right after the scan he told me he was so relieved that he didn't have to fake being happy. Now he’ll say he was joking. But I know he wasn’t.
I know that some people like to keep it a surprise, but for me I needed to know. I needed to give myself a vision to work towards and help me out during the hard parts of pregnancy and labour; especially if I was gonna go drug free. I also needed to be able to buy clothes that weren’t just a slightly different shade of white to the previous item. Unisex baby clothes are utter bollocks and mostly girly anyway.

River is reaching a stage where his face is changing so much; he’s really starting to look like a little boy and we just can’t stop kissing him. Jason is bonding with him more every day which I love. What I don't love is the "upside down boy" trick they do which makes me sweat heavily. We’ve had to buy a bigger bed because I keep getting shoved to the edge when all three of them get under the duvet for a cuddle and watch Thomas in their pyjamas (Pierre only wears pyjamas when it’s really cold or if he’s poorly) 
I know that Jason and I would have been equally besotted if we had a girl, despite what he says, but it definitely feels like we were meant to have a boy. We always refer to River and Pierre as 'the boys' and I have to remind Jason more times than I would like, that he has ONE son and ONE dog.

I understand the need to eliminate gender stereotypes and to steer away from identifying behaviour as “boyish” or “girly” but there are occasions where Riv is SUCH a boy. For example, he’s recently discovered his willy and he’s disregarding his bath toys in favour of investigating this body part. To an outsider, it would look bizarre to see me and Jason standing over the bath proudly watching him try to pull his willy off (God, he’s gonna love reading this in years to come, I’m sure) but it’s one of the funniest and cutest things to see from a 6 month old. When I see Jase do it, however, it’s much more unsettling.
I’ve read a lot about the differences between baby boys and baby girls and while everyone’s experience is different, a common comment is that baby boys are noticeably more affectionate. I obviously don’t have a girl to compare to but Riv is already so loving and every time he cuddles me, I melt like it’s the first time. I’m 100 percent sure that ALL babies are loving; I can just imagine that girls are a lot sassier about it.
If we did have a girl, I’m sure I would struggle with the princesses and those creepy dolls that shit out the pretend food you give them; they just aren't my steez. I guess Riv will be interested in whatever we expose him to, so I’m planning to try my hardest not to be too clich├ęd in my choices and let him be who he is. If he chooses the shitting doll at the shop then let’s go for it, but I know Jason is clinging to the idea of Riv loving Lego as much as he does (not that Riv will get a look in.)

Above all, I'm in love with River and I'm in love with the fact he's a mama's boy. And a daddy's boy. And a doggie's boy. I’d put up with the farts a million times over.  

Lads, lads, lads.


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